I had a wonderful few days this week, talking to another library book group who were so thoughtful and asked really interesting, considered questions. Then I went to London where I caused an incident due to Jerusalem-ingrained paranoia when I thought that someone at a bus stop had abandoned two bags of shopping - and the other guy at the bus stop also thought so! I called the police, gave them a full description, which did include me peering carefully into said bags to describe the lettuce within. Then, just as I hung up, my bus came - and an elderly man who may not have spoken English and must have been lurking in the shadows, picked up the carrier bags and got on the bus!
I was a little embarassed but then as the bus pulled away, I heard sirens, and two police cars sped past, then a third one pulled in front of our bus and two young police officers in bullet-proof-vests got on. I of course immediately admitted it was me, and they inspected this poor man's shopping and then headed off, murmuring into their radios - probably "Mad paranoid woman's wasting police time". Anyway, they haven't contacted me to tell me off, and I'd rather be paranoid and mortified than the alternative. Even if it was just lettuce.
So, the London trip was for me to be the speaker at a charity lunch for the League of Jewish Women. I've never done after-meal speaking, was rather nervous and thought I might manage 15 minutes including reading my stories. Turns out, I read and chatted about short stories and writing for about 40 mins without having really prepared much! Then there were questions and just as someone was asking the final questions, there was a kerfuffle in the corner and it turned out someone had fainted. Warm room, lots of people - not anything connected to my speech, they assured me! It was dealt with swiftly, she was fine... and everyone carried on as normal. My fiction packs a punch, clearly. Anyway, a lovely day, despite the conditions in London turning thundery and it taking 2 hours to get across town.
Today has been odd, and it's only 2pm, but the highlight so far has been the publication of my weird flash story, The Family, up on the excellent Metazen. Thank goodness for lit zines like Metazen who like the stuff I like and don't read my weirdnesses and shake their heads in dismay and incomprehension. Love 'em! To whet your appetite:
Although the family is not always available, the family is on hand when it comes to death....
Read the rest here.
And next week I will be hosting a stop on my friend Sue Guiney's virtual book tour for her new and wonderful novel, A Clash of Innocents. Stay tuned.
7 comments:
Well good for you, re the lettuces. I dont think enough of us do that, and in the end, it is that 'not wanting to bother anyone' that is sooo engrained in Brits that will let something nasty happen, sadly.
brill on the talk, and the story.
I must say I laughed outloud about the lettuce. Poor man. But I'm not a big fan of lettuce and on some days if I've eaten it it can have a similar effect as... oops gone too far.
It must be scary to faint. I must say I've never seen anyone faint in my life.
Brilliant - reminded me of the chap in the mall who picked up a cucumber and asked everyone he met if it was theirs! There's something sinister about salad!
V - I'm glad I did it, rather be safe than very very sorry.
Lauri - the police kept saying to me on the phone "Can you see what's in the bag, without putting yourself in danger", and all I could see was packet lettuce!!! The fainting was not pleasant, for her or for us. She sort of slumped in her chair, was very scary.
Rachel - there IS soemthing sinister about salad. I had it down as a very sneaky terrorist's plot to confuse us with Tesco's shopping, rather than a non-English-speaking and fond-of-wandering-off elderly man's wish not to carry his shopping with him as he roamed around the very dark bus stop!
Enjoyed 'The Family' very much. Not weird at all. Reminded me of Kay Dick's They which is a collection of stories is which 'they' are never identified.
I also enjoyed the "The Family" very much! Especially "After that, the family may not be available, may be unseen and unheard from for months or perhaps even years." For me you have captured the awkwardness of "blood is thicker than water", how we do things because we happen to be family ...
My impression of London was that it's just waiting for the next terrorist attack. Well done on all the things you mentioned.
Post a Comment