It's so hard for me to write this because on Friday night I said goodbye to my beautiful soul-companion for 16 years, Zachary.
It's almost unbearable for me. He was my familiar, the best friend a writer could have, a lap cat, an adventurer, a great talker, a champion sleeper. He was our Boy.
I had foolishly dreamed he might break all records for the longest-lived cat in history. You think that, you can't help it. But he couldn't, he was very ill, and we couldn't bear to see him in pain. At least that we could do for him.
Goodbye, my Zac. I imagine you watching us from a parallel universe, maybe one millisecond shifted from this one, where you are healed and whole, and you have all the chicken you could desire. Rest in peace, gorgeous boy.
18 comments:
So sorry to hear that Zac has slid through the gap into eternity. May you feel the love of his happy purr in your ear forever.
So sorry Zac has died. I know how hard it is to lose a dear cat. You did the very best you could for him and I'm glad you had so many happy years together.
Thinking of you, Tania. I know how painful this is.
So sorry to hear that, Tania. ~Miriam
xxx and happy memories of Zac - including his gymnastic leaps onto the fridge with the longest legs in catdom, v
Hi, Tania. Thank you for blogging about Zac and sharing your feelings. It's good to see Zac and to know a little more about his life with you. I hope our much loved Polly (died 01/01/13) and her daughter Peaches (died a week ago) are frolicking with Zac in the same parallel universe. I read somewhere recently, can't recall where, the idea that animals are non-human people. I'd go along with that - certainly with regard to cats. Thinking of you. x
It never ceases to amaze me just how these wee creatures worm their ways into our affections. I grew up with cats and several died over the years and the holes they left in my life were very real. We don’t have a cat just now—we have a cockatiel my wife rescued from our windowsill who’s been with us for probably about ten years now and if you’d’ve told me when he first arrived just how much our lives would end up revolving around this wee ball of fluff I’d never’ve believed you. He wasn’t a baby when he arrived but they can live twenty years easily and I hate to think what this place will be like without him. Cleaner, yes—he is a messy wee bugger—and quieter but also emptier. My heart goes out to you.
I'm sorry for your loss. I never know what to say, how comfort can be given in times as this, but I want to say something. I lost my best friends Toby and Whiskers in 2001 and 2004. I think of them every day and even if they're no longer physically here, they bring me much joy for all the beautiful and funny and caring and silly memories, and my most recurring dream is that they come back to life and are just themselves, and I am never sad when I wake to find them gone but happy to have spent another few hours in their company. I wish you the strength and love you need right now, and a lifetime of happy memories to enjoy.
Pageturners, thank you so much, I hope so.
Frances, thank you, and so sorry to hear you've been through this too although the depth of grief testifies to the strength of the connection, right, and I would not have had it any other way.
Christopher, thank you. I don't know if I will make it to the US, not sure if I will be able.
Miriam, thank you.
V - oh yes, his leaps remained quite olympian despite his age and his one working eye, he never shirked from a challenge, dear little one.
Oscar - I'd go along with that too. My condolences once again to you, I can't imagine a second loss after one such sadness. Rest in peace, Polly and Peaches.
Jim, I love what you wrote, it's so true. Our lives would be easier without these creatures - not having to clean their fur, buy food, pay vets billes, find someone to stay with them when we went away - but what is the use of an "easy" life like that without the mutual love of someone whose absence will leave such a hole? Your cockatoo sounds very special, wishing you many more years together.
The Hill, thank you so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment. I'm so sorry about Toby and Whiskers, but it gladdens me to hear that they are still bringing you joy. I hope I get to that point, I'm already able to get pleasure from the (many) pictures we have of Zac, so glad that I photographed him obsessively, like a doting mother, eh.
Big fat hugs, I remember exactly how it feels. x
Sorry for your loss :-( xx
Oh Tania, I am so sorry to hear this. I send many gentle, squeezy hugs your way.
Tracey, thank you. xx
Hayley, thanks so much. xx
Sara, your hugs are much appreciated. xx
Thinking of you at this terribly sad time. What a long friendship you had together, it must be very difficult. x
Hello Tania
This is so sad. Our cat, Leo lived to nineteen years of age and like you I had hopes he'd go on forever. Loved hearing about Zac's Olympian leaps.
Huge hugs, Tania, and much sympathy. xx
Alison, thank you. It feels like I've entered a parallel universe, it's so strange.
Caroline, so so sorry to hear about leo, 19 years is a formidable age, let's hope they are basking in the sun together.
Debs, thank you xx
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